I wanted to thank EVERYONE who helped with the funeral arrangements and the actual funeral. It was a touching tribute to Glenn, I hope he was there to see it. I wish I could say I know he was there- but I think I am too distraught to really feel much if anything spiritual right now.
However I did go to the grave yesterday and was worried it would upset me, but felt a profound peace that I hadn't before. My boys are struggling right along with me, all in different ways. Makes me fear the months ahead, but just like dealing with the SPS, we must forge ahead and do the best we can-together.
I seem to do better when I stay busy and it isn't quiet- but I know when that quiet finally comes I will have a come apart once again, but for now I am trying to just drag myself out of bed and pretend I am strong and stay as distracted as possible.
What you are feeling is very natural. Give yourself a break, you don't always have to be strong. Hold on to your faith, it is the only thing that will truly see you through. Those peaceful times will come more often once the grasp of pain loosens it grip. We are all still praying for you and the boys! You are beautiful!
ReplyDeleteFalling apart is just one more way to deal with it all. It is supposed to happen. You love Glenn...it is ok to feel the loss. Just remember that all the support you have had up until now...still exists. We are right here for you. Love you...
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